I looked up the origin of the phrase “true blue.” 

Some people believe that it refers to the endless blue sky above us, the blue yonder.  Others suggest that it might have had something to do with the purity of noble lineage, as in “blue blood.”  My favorite theory is that the idea was first associated with a particular dye-making technique in Coventry, England, in the Middle Ages.  Coventry Blue was the best.  It didn’t run or fade like other blue dyes of the period. It lasted, it remained true.  The original phrase, in its entirety, was: “as true as Coventry Blue.”

It seems apt that “blue,” now, can also mean “sad.” 

Because being true to our own feelings, honoring the completeness of our emotional landscape, needs must include some measure of nostalgia and heartache, or at least bitter-sweetness.

The colors of grief and loss, with time, do become less sharp; they fade with wear. Any feeling, buoyant or weighty, tends to become familiar and maybe even comfortable the longer we inhabit it.  But still the blues can pop with renewed intensity from time to time.  This often happens around the holidays, especially.   

The truth is that sadness endures. 

It is so important to remember that this sadness doesn’t necessarily mean that something’s wrong.  Neither something wrong with the world, nor something wrong with us.

It’s okay to be blue, to mourn, to feel moody and melancholy and maybe even a little grumpy and miserable.  It’s okay to remember the past, and look back with sweet sorrow, love, and longing.  It is more than okay — it’s kind of essential — for us to try to recognize and respect everything that’s genuinely going on in our hearts, whatever it may be…

It’s also perfectly fine to be confusingly happy at the same time.  We get to be complex.  Sincerely, to be such a contradictory mixed bag of emotions is probably the most authentic expression for most of us most of the time.

Sure, this season calls for the donning of gay apparel — sparkling gowns, and funny-ugly sweaters, and reindeer ears, and jingle bells.   That doesn’t mean we can’t get our blues on as well. 

I say, it’s wholesome and healthy and good to add some honest bluesy notes to the “fa la la la la.”  Let’s share robustly the beautiful fullness of our tender hearts.

This Sunday, we hold a special place for the ambivalent, convoluted paradox that we are during the holiday season — happy and sad at the same time, in love and loss, sometimes lonely in a crowd, thin-skinned and tough as shoe leather all at once. And we get to practice kindness towards ourselves and each other through all of it.

Even when I’m blue, it is a joy to be with you, friends.  Celebrating our connection whether we’re together in person or far from each other, whether we’re up or down, while we keep on keeping on navigating the ever-shifting terrain of human community and possibility.

I can’t wait to be with you this Sunday, December 21, 10:00 am, at q-Staff Theater. 

With special music by Patty Stephens and a sweet prayer and ritual for those we’ve loved, those we’ve lost, those who are struggling, and those who help light the way forward.  XO, Drew

©2025 Drew Groves